My Human is Trying to Be A Cat!

And she's doing a really bad job of it too! Talk about being a second, or fifteenth, rate cat!
Before, she was actually meowing at me, I think cuz I was meowing at her! Finally, I stopped meowing cuz I wanted her to SHADDUP!
Then, she said her back was a little stiff. Waah waah! What am I supposed to do about it? I knead fronts and sides, not backs! So I had been laying down for a while, and I am an old cat, no matter how ya slice it, so I stretched, very gracefully, I might say.
She saw that and she said "Hmm, that might work for me too!" So she grabbed the arm of the rocking chair thing and put one leg up and stretched her back leg down as far as it would go. I think it was a pathetic attempt, but she said she's only human. Then she went and did it with the other leg, still pathetic.
Then she said "Ahh! That feels better! Now I know why everybody wants to be a cat!"
Too funny I furgot to laugh!
She makes an awful cat. Cats are graceful, she isn't. Cats are sleek, she isn't. Most cats can sing operas, she can't .. .she can't even sing rock 'n'roll or the score to The Sound of Mewsic!